During my childhood, I was thinking all purposes of my life is pursuing and finding happiness. As much as I went after that, I’ve found that farther and more unreachable. My mind was disappointed in finding that, but my heart always murmuring, I will find it one day.
A few years ago I’ve found this TED talk from Emily Esfahani Smith, which is explaining the purpose of our life is not finding happiness. It was strong proof for my heart to stop going after that. https://www.ted.com/talks/emily_esfahani_smith_there_s_more_to_life_than_being_happy#t-5412
But I have great news for you and that is it, finally, I’ve found where is permanent HAPPINESS. Come with me to tell you the secret.
Where is your anchor points? Maybe you ask me what I mean by anchor points. Anchor points are your grounding points. Where you count on them to keep you forever and if you lose them you lose your life. In childhood, our anchor points are our parents whom we depend totally on. As much as you had more reliable and more supportive parents you had a more happy childhood. You see the link between our happiness and our anchor points in our childhood. We went one step closer to the answer! If we survived our childhood with complete vulnerability, we will become an adult. The time to become independent from our childhood anchor points.
In adulthood we still need anchor points but for sure those can’t be the ones from our childhood. Can you count your current anchor points. Probably you will say, your partner, your job, your saving or maybe your friends …
You see, none of them are reliable and permanent. All of them are great source of temporary happiness but as long as you can not count on them forever, they can not be your true anchor points. And I have a bad news for you. If you have another human being as your anchor points, sooner or later he/she will become your biggest enemy. Why? Because you are like a Heavy weight on their shoulder and you are a parasite for them. To be an healthy creature we need to draw away all parasites from our body and the one who hook their anchor points on us should be removed. Now you can think of when you were parasite for other one and when other one was parasite for you. And what happened later. So there is a link between our happiness and our anchor points. Our childhood anchor points are not useful anymore and our adulthood happiness can be reached by finding a true anchor points. Now we need to see how to find them and where to find them.
What is what we have forever in this world? My answer is my body and the ground under my feet. You see what! There is only one permanent option for our anchor points. And it is the ground or earth under our feet. If we ground our body on the ground and consider ground as our anchor points we will taste true happiness. I know it is not easy to do that and always we will lose our connection with that, but as long as we know the solution for bringing ourself back to happy state, there is no worry. Whenever you see yourself anxious and unhappy be sure you lose your connection with your true anchor points, and as it is always there under your feet, you always can come back to that and reach your true happy state :)
My dear friend, Courtney Xin, shared with me the following affirmations card, which I’ve found so precious and wanted to keep below forever.